Life after vulval cancer surgery
Your feelings after vulval surgery
As with most things in life, people react very differently to vulval cancer surgery. Some people manage. But others may feel very upset afterwards, particularly if they have had a big operation on the vulval and genital area. These are very private parts of your body and you may find it very difficult to talk to others about how you are feeling. Your vulva may be very important to your image of yourself as a woman, and your self confidence may be affected. Many women need time to come to terms with the changes surgery may bring.
The first months may be very upsetting. Many women have conflicting feelings, including
- Grief
- Fear
- Shock
- Anger and resentment
These feelings may be mixed with relief that your doctor has found the cancer and you've had treatment. In time, your initial feelings of fear, shock, or anger will almost certainly improve, particularly if you have support from family or friends. If these negative feelings don't go, you may be becoming depressed. Talk to your doctor or specialist nurse if you are worried about this. They may recommend some counselling. This will help you to sort out your feelings and get them into perspective. Or your doctor might suggest a course of anti depressants. This isn't unusual after cancer treatment. It won't be for ever and will help you over a difficult period.
It is common for women to feel less feminine while they come to terms with this type of treatment. Some have feelings so strong that they describe them as feeling assaulted after their operation. Do contact one of the self help organisations if you feel like this. It may really help you to realise that other women who've been through the same thing feel the same way. And it will get better in time.
There is a section called your feelings. It describes the different emotions women may have, and how friends, family and others can help.
Sexuality after vulval surgery
Vulval surgery will affect your physical ability to have sex. And your emotions may change your sexual feelings for a while. Women generally need to feel happy with their bodies to have a satisfying sex life. One recovered patient said to us that it was certainly possible to have a very satisfying sex life after radical vulvectomy, but not until you've accepted the new you.
This type of surgery does not affect your ability to become pregnant. But discuss this with your doctor if you are having any other type of treatments such as radiotherapy or chemotherapy. These treatments may affect your fertility.
After surgery, it can take several months for the vulval area to heal and for sensation in the area to improve. If surgery has caused scarring, your vagina may be much tighter than it was before surgery. You may need to use a vaginal dilator to help stretch it again. If you have had your clitoris removed, it will feel different when you have sex. You may find it more difficult to reach a sexual climax (orgasm). So do not feel you have to rush things. You may not feel like having sexual intercourse for some time but you can still enjoy intimacy with touch and through talking to your partner. Encouragingly, women who've had this type of treatment tell us that orgasm is possible, even if you've had your clitoris removed, but may take longer.
You may worry about the first time you let your partner see or touch your body again. Some women need time to be alone and come to terms with what has happened. This is very natural and some women want to build up their courage to face someone else – even a deeply loved partner. Others need almost instant comfort and find loving touch will relieve their fear of being rejected.
If you find it difficult to relax during sex, you may find it helpful to learn how to relax. There are books and tapes that explain relaxation techniques. Contact your local cancer support group – they may have books and tapes they can lend you, or they may have classes at their group. Your specialist nurse or library may have relaxation tapes or books you can borrow.
Be aware this can be a difficult time for your partner as well. They may not know how to give you the love and support you need so try to involve them in discussions with your doctor about your surgery and how it may affect your relationships. This can have a positive effect on your recovery.
If you are not in a relationship at the moment, you may feel worried about starting a new one after your operation. Talk to your gynaecological nurse specialist about how you are feeling. You may find it helpful to get in touch with someone who has been through this type of surgery. There are organisations in the vulval cancer organisations section who will be able to put you in touch with someone who has been through a similar experience.
If you would like to talk to someone outside your own friends and family, look in our page about counselling organisations that can help put in touch with someone. To find out more about counselling look in What is Counselling?
Arriving home from hospital after surgery can be an anxious time. Coming to terms with all you have experienced and the changes to your body can be a lot to deal with. You may find it helpful to take your partner on your clinic visits before the operation. That way they will be prepared for how you may feel and look when you come home. They may be more able to help support you emotionally if they understand what is planned.
http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/cancer-help/type/vulval-cancer/living/life-after-vulval-cancer-surgery
In this article one of the negative effects I noticed is that after the surgery you experience lack of libido. Many women loose interest in wanting to participate in sexual activities. It is possible to have sex but enjoying is a problem many women face. You are still able to have a child after the treatment but your partner may not be willing to. Also after surgery, it causes you to feel different about your body and uncomfortable. Chemotherapy and radiotherapy affect fertility.
Sexuality after vulval surgery
Vulval surgery will affect your physical ability to have sex. And your emotions may change your sexual feelings for a while. Women generally need to feel happy with their bodies to have a satisfying sex life. One recovered patient said to us that it was certainly possible to have a very satisfying sex life after radical vulvectomy, but not until you've accepted the new you.
This type of surgery does not affect your ability to become pregnant. But discuss this with your doctor if you are having any other type of treatments such as radiotherapy or chemotherapy. These treatments may affect your fertility.
After surgery, it can take several months for the vulval area to heal and for sensation in the area to improve. If surgery has caused scarring, your vagina may be much tighter than it was before surgery. You may need to use a vaginal dilator to help stretch it again. If you have had your clitoris removed, it will feel different when you have sex. You may find it more difficult to reach a sexual climax (orgasm). So do not feel you have to rush things. You may not feel like having sexual intercourse for some time but you can still enjoy intimacy with touch and through talking to your partner. Encouragingly, women who've had this type of treatment tell us that orgasm is possible, even if you've had your clitoris removed, but may take longer.
You may worry about the first time you let your partner see or touch your body again. Some women need time to be alone and come to terms with what has happened. This is very natural and some women want to build up their courage to face someone else – even a deeply loved partner. Others need almost instant comfort and find loving touch will relieve their fear of being rejected.
If you find it difficult to relax during sex, you may find it helpful to learn how to relax. There are books and tapes that explain relaxation techniques. Contact your local cancer support group – they may have books and tapes they can lend you, or they may have classes at their group. Your specialist nurse or library may have relaxation tapes or books you can borrow.
Be aware this can be a difficult time for your partner as well. They may not know how to give you the love and support you need so try to involve them in discussions with your doctor about your surgery and how it may affect your relationships. This can have a positive effect on your recovery.
If you are not in a relationship at the moment, you may feel worried about starting a new one after your operation. Talk to your gynaecological nurse specialist about how you are feeling. You may find it helpful to get in touch with someone who has been through this type of surgery. There are organisations in the vulval cancer organisations section who will be able to put you in touch with someone who has been through a similar experience.
If you would like to talk to someone outside your own friends and family, look in our page about counselling organisations that can help put in touch with someone. To find out more about counselling look in What is Counselling?
Arriving home from hospital after surgery can be an anxious time. Coming to terms with all you have experienced and the changes to your body can be a lot to deal with. You may find it helpful to take your partner on your clinic visits before the operation. That way they will be prepared for how you may feel and look when you come home. They may be more able to help support you emotionally if they understand what is planned.
http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/cancer-help/type/vulval-cancer/living/life-after-vulval-cancer-surgery
In this article one of the negative effects I noticed is that after the surgery you experience lack of libido. Many women loose interest in wanting to participate in sexual activities. It is possible to have sex but enjoying is a problem many women face. You are still able to have a child after the treatment but your partner may not be willing to. Also after surgery, it causes you to feel different about your body and uncomfortable. Chemotherapy and radiotherapy affect fertility.
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